Hiiiiiiilarious
I was going through some files on my computer and found a joke letter of recommendation that one of my colleagues had crafted. (She comes off as cynical, but she's actually a really nice person once you get to know her. One day, I decided to make fun of her "I'm so bitter" persona by calling her "Sunshine." She answered by giving me the nickname, "Skippy." We've been calling eachother by these lame nicknames ever since.) Without futher ado . . .
I have known the candidate for several weeks—since he stumbled into me, literally, in a bar. Even though he’d been drinking for hours, I found him to be very well-spoken (if somewhat slurred) and quite bright. Skippy (that’s what he called himself, no idea why) was considering his next career move and I immediately suggested he give the exciting world of marketing a try.
Since joining our team, Skippy has been fairly reliable, often remembering to return to work after lunch. He has occasionally completed assignments and once even asked, “Hey, have you got any other crap for me to do, or can I just spend the rest of my shift taking a nap under my desk?” It’s always impressive when a new employee shows initiative and wants to take on more work.
Skippy is very motivated—in addition to showing up for work here, he was also studying every night for his GED, even attending special classes to increase his score. You know, if more parolees had his attitude, we’d have a lot less crime in the world. I believe Skippy would be an asset to The Stratford Career Institute, I’m confident that he can easily master the trade of his choice—he took several correspondence courses during his time away and is already certified in veterinary assisting, tv/vcr repair and landscaping.
We’ll be sorry to lose him at XXXXX, but we would never stand in his way. Actually, he may have already left, I haven’t seen him for several days, but we knew he was destined for bigger things.
Coming across this letter reminded me of something I had seen on droodoggie's blog. My favorite paragraph in droo's joke letter of rec:
Andrew is a born leader who can make quick complex decisions. His quick take charge leadership abilities even saved my life once. We were both involved in an alcohol induced car crash where he immediately determined that my heart had stopped. His conclusion puzzled me because I was still able to breathe and walk and carry on a conversation but he was quite convinced that my heart had ceased functioning. He wasted no time and was able to restart my heart using nothing more than a car battery, a bicycle pump and some speaker wire. I was left with a very large scar and one of my nipples had to be surgically removed but at least I am alive today and able to write this recommendation due to his heroic efforts.
Hey, at least our recommenders were having fun with the application process.
I have known the candidate for several weeks—since he stumbled into me, literally, in a bar. Even though he’d been drinking for hours, I found him to be very well-spoken (if somewhat slurred) and quite bright. Skippy (that’s what he called himself, no idea why) was considering his next career move and I immediately suggested he give the exciting world of marketing a try.
Since joining our team, Skippy has been fairly reliable, often remembering to return to work after lunch. He has occasionally completed assignments and once even asked, “Hey, have you got any other crap for me to do, or can I just spend the rest of my shift taking a nap under my desk?” It’s always impressive when a new employee shows initiative and wants to take on more work.
Skippy is very motivated—in addition to showing up for work here, he was also studying every night for his GED, even attending special classes to increase his score. You know, if more parolees had his attitude, we’d have a lot less crime in the world. I believe Skippy would be an asset to The Stratford Career Institute, I’m confident that he can easily master the trade of his choice—he took several correspondence courses during his time away and is already certified in veterinary assisting, tv/vcr repair and landscaping.
We’ll be sorry to lose him at XXXXX, but we would never stand in his way. Actually, he may have already left, I haven’t seen him for several days, but we knew he was destined for bigger things.
Coming across this letter reminded me of something I had seen on droodoggie's blog. My favorite paragraph in droo's joke letter of rec:
Andrew is a born leader who can make quick complex decisions. His quick take charge leadership abilities even saved my life once. We were both involved in an alcohol induced car crash where he immediately determined that my heart had stopped. His conclusion puzzled me because I was still able to breathe and walk and carry on a conversation but he was quite convinced that my heart had ceased functioning. He wasted no time and was able to restart my heart using nothing more than a car battery, a bicycle pump and some speaker wire. I was left with a very large scar and one of my nipples had to be surgically removed but at least I am alive today and able to write this recommendation due to his heroic efforts.
Hey, at least our recommenders were having fun with the application process.
posted by Jerry Blank at 2:47 PM
3 Comments:
J.B.
That was some good fun, enjoyed every line of it......I am wondering maybe some of my past supervisors do think of us in some similar fashion.....keep it comming :-) LOL!!!!!!!!!!!
Ho ho!! If I had been on adcom, I wud have definitely admitted skippy...for diversity sake ;-)
This is what happens to employees who have been encaged in cubicles for years. They lose their minds and end up giving out letters of recommendation like this.
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